"Every year in this country 300 kids take their own lives. It is a mind-boggling number. And this past week one of those kids was Jamie Hubley. He was 15, he was depressed and he happened to be gay.
And because this is 2011 we don't just read about a kid like Jamie, we can Google him and then the next thing you know, you’re sitting at home watching his videos on YouTube. And he was gay all right. He was a great big goofy gay kid singing Lady Gaga on the Internet. And as an adult you look at that and you go, you know what, that kid’s going places. But for some reason, some kids, they looked at that and they attacked. And now he's gone.
And because this story is all too familiar we know exactly what’s going to happen next. Grief counselors will go into the school, as they should. But what about the old fashioned assembly? You know, where the cops show up and there's hell to pay and they find out who’s responsible. You know like when the lunchroom is vandalized. Because the kids who bullied this boy, they know who they are. And more importantly other kids know who they are.
It's no longer good enough for us to tell kids who are different that it’s going to get better. We have to make it better now, that's every single one of us. Every teacher, every student, every adult has to step up to the plate. And that’s gay adults too. Because I know gay cops, soldiers, athletes, cabinet ministers, a lot of us do, but the problem is adults, we don't need role models. Kids do. So if you're gay and you’re in public life, I'm sorry, you don't have to run around with a pride flag and bore the hell out of everyone, but you can't be invisible either. Not anymore. 300 kids is 300 too many."
- Rick Mercer
It gets better. Stop bullying now!
I saw this rant, and then I watched some of Jamie Hubley's videos. He seemed like a regular kid who deserved the same respect as the next person. It breaks my heart when I hear about people being bullied. I went through some of that in elementary school, but thankfully, I had a great high-school experience. I'm so thankful that I had friends outside of school who affirmed that I was a person of value and worth. Now that we have little people in our family, I hope and pray that they will feel loved and valued by all of us, their family and that they will make friends with kids who will make them feel included and valued as well.
ReplyDeleteThe next time any of us sees someone bullied, we can't allow ourselves to blend in with the crowd. We need to speak up, and stop it from happening.
I thought it was interesting too, what Rick Mercer said about kids being confronted in an assembly. I don't think that's a bad idea. I don't necessarily think the bullies should be targeted in front of the whole school, but I do think that they should be made to take responsability for their part in this trajedy. They should have to do some community service, maybe working with little kids, under supervision. And maybe they should do some sort of healing circle with the Hubley family, and their family and extended families - to apologize and forgive and discuss and heal. I don't think that happens enough. And although it might be hard for the bullies and the victim's family, I think it's good for people to get together and talk and see that we are all real people with real lives and real hurts and real feelings.
The other big bullying story in the news is about the hockey hazing incident in Manitoba junior hockey. No kid should have to go through ritual abbuse and humiliation by teammates in the name of "team bonding" or for any other reason. The victim was actually forced to apologize to his teammates for bringing the situation to light! That is unbelievable. Thankfully though, this has brought hockey hazing to light, and hopefully, this will discourage other teams from doing the same awful things. And the victim has also thankfully received support from former NHL hockey players who had themselves suffered abuses as young hockey players.
I don't know what it is about kids and their hormones and their stage of development that creates this volatile period where there tends to be a lot of this picking on those who are younger and weaker. But it still happens in workplaces and it has happened to me and others in my workplace. Unfortunately, bullying isn't somethind people seem to grow out of...
So, anywhere we see bullying happening, it is time to stand up for the victim and not tolerate it any longer.
Yeah, this was very tragic. You guys captured it all. I think Mercer was calling out John Baird to go public, whose sexual orientation is Ottawa's worst-kept secret.
ReplyDeleteI like to think I was a fairly nice kid in school. I have to admit that there were a few occasions when there was some name calling, etc., that I contributed to. I still feel really bad about that to this day.
Yeah, I'm a bit protective of our little guy on all that too, when I see one of the other kids at daycare take a toy or push him. It doesn't happen often, but it really gets my back up. He's only 1.5, of course, but it will be tricky to strike the right balance of standing up for him and also letting him learn to stand up for himself.
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ReplyDeleteHopefully John Baird will come out on his own but I highly doubt he will considering he's a Conservative. Someone will have to out the elephant in the room.
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